Hi, everybody! Long time, no see!

[ScriptNurse]

Ah yes ... ooops.

"ADRIENNE JONES (20s), a long-haired African-American beauty clad in a lacy nightgown, wanders into view."

She appears and that's that. What purpose does she serve in the scene?

[aj1981]

Confused. AJ's the only one speaking. Did you mean Erin?

[ScriptNurse]

You've referred to AJ, but you failed to place him in the scene along with the two women.

[aj1981]

Started on a new project and would like honest critiques and good examples on how I could pick up the pace on the first two pages of my script. Thanks for reading.