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Author Topic: Goliath  (Read 932 times)
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ScriptNurse
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« Reply #3 on: March 30, 2011, 07:50:02 PM »

Ooops ... I guess I missed that detail.

My only observation is that some of the dialogue seems a bit wordy, so here is what _I_ would do ... since the dialogue will be recorded first, do several versions ... first, as it is written ... then write alternative lines for the longer scenes where it's so tight and terse it almost doesn't seem quite right ... and then let the actors improvise their version, which will probably be somewhere in between the two.  Hopefully, this will give you options when you start the animation process.
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Don BledsoeWant to write screenplays? READ SCREENPLAYS!
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« Reply #2 on: March 30, 2011, 03:04:03 AM »

Hello Don. Thanks for your reply and input.
I don't think we've been very clear in our first post. The finished product will be a 3d animated movie made in 3d software. We made the script ourselves based on Neil Gaiman's original story. We have till the end of July, but we fear it'll take a month or two more to finish. The moving shots you mentioned will be used in most scenes, especially during action parts.

At the moment we are working on a pre-visual. We will probably post this once we've finished it so you can have a better idea of the end result. If you're interested we could also post some concept art.

Do you have any more input on the script itself? Maybe there are lines that felt out of place or things that you would change visually.


Thanks in advance.
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ScriptNurse
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« Reply #1 on: March 29, 2011, 08:16:40 PM »

This is quite an ambitious undertaking.  I'll put the script formatting stuff aside, since you know this is going to be shot.  I'd estimate the running time will be 11-12 minutes.  Make sure your director is VERY well organized.  If you want a nice polished look, keep the camera moving, even if only slightly.  That's the one big thing about American cinema -- we move our cameras.  Beg, borrow, plead or promise sex to get your hands on a SteadiCam-like device with an operator ... it'll make a huge difference if it's done right.

I'd love to see the finished film.
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Don BledsoeWant to write screenplays? READ SCREENPLAYS!
Screenwriter & ProducerWant control? GO TO FILM SCHOOL!
Representation: Eileen OFarrell, OFarrell Management (818) 985-3136
Attorney: Paul S. Levine (310) 450-6711
Websites: Script Nurse, Go With The Flo Productions Inc., Queen Dad
nhlsockpuppets
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« on: March 29, 2011, 05:06:10 AM »

Hey all,

We are a group of students from the Netherlands and currently working on a graduation project.
We're going to make a short (10 minutes) 3D movie based on the story 'Goliath' by Neil Gaiman.

Any comments on the screenplay are much appreciated.

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